Dear Dad: I’m Back! Welcome to Journey with Jess Jones YOGA
The first time I recall writing those words beyond a homemade birthday card as a little girl, was exactly 3 years and 11 months ago. Why do I know that? It was one month after you sipped your last sweet breath of this life, 4 years ago today. Writing that letter through tear soaked eyes (and lets face it, a snotty mess) and the very few that followed, was my only way of communicating with you, all that I never shared. It was also my last attempts to keep alive this very website (then blog) that you so faithfully read and encouraged.
So 4 years on, I’ve felt called to release my new website a little prematurely, and share with you and the world, just a glimpse of what’s to come! And a little bit about what needs to go….
To be honest Dad, it’s occurred to me through some pretty intensive journaling, that I am holding you back… and I’ve been allowing myself to be held back by your loving grip.
But before we get into that, a little update…
So, I’m back in India right where I was celebrating your life last year, and the year before that, and yep, the year before that… You know, you’re the one that finally got me to make my first journey to India, and man did it open up a new life for me. Whilst I certainly wish it was under other circumstances, nonetheless this was really the beginning of my spiritual journey. We spoke of it before, you and I, about the universe, and consciousness and God, and something bigger. But it wasn’t something I could grasp.
It was in those first weeks in Rishikesh that I was grieving your early departure, that I began to explore those lofty topics. I began to understand That something bigger, that all pervading, faceless, formless, Source energy, and as immeasurable and incomprehensible as the divine universe maybe, it too is right there inside each of us. And that connects us, you and me. And then without even knowing it, without understanding what happened at the time, it simply all became ok.
So Dad, I’m back here in the spiritual land that I now have grown so deeply connected to. And I’m continuing my spiritual journey through yoga and its immense depth. And Dad you’ll be pleased to know, I’m taking massive strides to finally begin to share this path through my experience to date, with the world. You know I don’t do things by halves, so it’s going to be big. It has to be. I have been called to share this path. I am bringing Eastern tradition to the West through my teaching and sharing, and bringing the West to the East for deep immersion retreats (a taste of what I’ve experienced,) and Dad this is all for something far bigger… Soon I will bring incredibly talented young Yoga teachers from here in India, to share the true essence of yoga with the West and provide them an opportunity to travel and have their voice heard!
Thank you for sparking this journey for me, as difficult as it was to see at the time.
I know you are there watching over my shoulder, watching out for me and protecting me as you always did. But Dad, it’s time for you to free yourself. Your soul has more lives to live. We can’t be your anchor anymore. Just as this bond has kept you from continuing on your path, into the next cycle, iv’e allowed it to hold me back. I can say this to you honestly now Dad, I would have sooner, but it has only just become clear. I have been holding you back by not stepping up fully as a woman, a business owner, in life and in love. You’ve been hanging back there waiting to make sure I’m ok, that I’m supported and loved and happy and that I’m doing my souls work and sharing with the masses.
I’m doing it, the work I love Dad, and I will help so many people live their best life. I help them release their self imposed restrictions, energy blocks and limiting beliefs. I guide them to the source of all their greatness. I share with them the path of yoga that will bring them freedom and discipline and awareness and evolution, as well health and wellness and energy and clarity…a life they love living. I share with them all you were searching for! I’ve connected to that wisdom and experience that has almost been living dormant inside of me, and I’m sharing it Dad! I’m on my path completely, A life that I truly love.
SO you see, I really am well. And I really am happy. And I am stepping up, stepping into my power, that power you always saw within me. I’m doing it once and for all and you don’t need to stand on the sideline anymore. I’ll be a force so powerful you’ll feel my vibration, you’ll feel the ripple effect!
But you must carry on… Share your light. There is still so much more of your soul to share. And i know that if you come back in the next life first as a flower, you’ll be most vibrant flower. Or if you come back as dog, you’ll love and protect and honour the family that takes you in. And when you come back in the human form you’ll still be the loving man that you’ve always been, the strict but playful father, the supportive and hard working husband. And Dad, let your adventurous spirit take you to all the corners of the globe, let your keen financial discipline allow you to live abundantly. Allow yourself the freedom to make mistakes, and be open about it, allow yourself to be open with your feelings and be vulnerable, you’ll still be strong don’t worry. And please keep being your quirky, fun loving, energetic, self. Connect more with others and connect more with your soul. This will be a life of evolution for you…your souls work will be waiting for you in this next life, something bigger, something you’ll be even more passionate about, a force that I too will feel in the energy of the universe.
And we’ll still be connected. Always. You don’t need to stand behind me to protect me, to be my rock any more. I’ve got this. You go and shine your light and radiate your infectious energy. Go play the song of your soul. And go in flow, with the current…
There is nothing left to fight, you are free.
Light and Love
Your little girl